Stall No. 4

I am like most people - I form judgments. It's inevitable. I was given brains, thus, I think, I rationalize, I see the good. And yes, I see the bad, too....

As a new member of the College of Business Administration Faculty, I spend most of my free time at the Faculty Room - checking test papers, blogging (we got a computer with internet access), reading, sleeping, etc. When I get bored, there is the canteen to go to. I love to eat! Well, that is if my eating disorder does not prevail. But because our office is located directly in front of the canteen, I can't help but check out the food, and ultimately eat.

There are five stalls, each serving its own specialties. The first two stalls are usually the most crowded. They serve more viands compared to the other three. They put the food that they offer behind a glass something.

The third stall serves viands in covered trays (that's what these things are called according to Erwin). And because the trays are covered, consumers need to take off the covers first before they will know what exactly the food being served is. That is not very convenient. And there is also an assumption that if you dare take off the covers and check out the food, the food servers will expect you to buy. They would ask, "Ano inyo Ma'am?" And because you do not want to offend them, you will be forced to buy. For that reason, very few dare check what's hidden on those trays. I have not yet bought any viand from Stall No. 3.

I don't really care about Stall No. 5. It could exist or evaporate. I, together with many others, probably would not notice.

So we now go to Stall No. 4. This is nothing personal. I am making this clear: I have nothing against the stall, food, owner and/or servers. I just have a lot to say. Hehe.

Stall No. 4 does not attract many buyers. They serve just two viands which do not look enticing. The owner and her helper are not engaging people. And they are guilty of so many other marketing violations.

The owner is probably the slowest moving person I've seen. Her clients are already filling and she couldn't care less. If she is texting, she would not put down her phone until she's finished. And she texts a lot! And you may be giving your order, and she would only look up at you (for a long time). It takes me three times at an average to say what I want before she makes a move.

But why do I keep coming back? Because I wouldn't really be able to say a lot unless I go there a lot. Well, I may not like her and her marketing mix, but I am addicted to her banana cue. This post was supposed to be entitled "Banana Cue", but a specific experience earlier made me change the title and the course of this story. For now, on banana cue, I'd like to share that I have never been this attached to any food as I am to this one. I consume around four in a day!!! This is the only reason why I tolerate seeing that owner and her helper.

So, let us go now to the specific experience... I liked the look of her chicken-something viand and placed my order, one-half cup of rice and that viand. Then, the helper said, "Hindi kami naga-serve ng half Ma'am." Without second thoughts, I said "ok" and walked away. Haha. I heard the slow-moving owner call me and say, "Ma'am, ok lang po." I'm so mean, but it gave me a little happiness to have turned away from them. They forgot one thing: they need consumers more than we need them. We make the choices.

I did not get mad. I had fun. I hope they learned their lesson there: be flexible. I'm not a person who keeps grudges (but then, how can I when I claim to have had fun). Geez, I'm so mean.

Anyway, I came back for the banana cue. And will come back again and again for it. I might try the "half-rice" order again. And the walk out. Hehe

Going Places

For two months, I've been waiting for an opportunity to engage in activities that entail going to other places, like how it was in my school years. And finally, this opportunity came yesterday - to go to a community in Lambayong, Sultan Kudarat to give out relief goods to the people who were victims of Typhoon Frank.

I have so much to say and share, yet I could not find the right words. Actually, I can try, but I have no enough time or energy for writing that story right now. I want to do the experience some justice so storytelling will have to wait.

I would not say that it was fun. No, it wasn't.... But it was certainly a moving and learning experience.

GMA and Leadership

I did not see and hear GMA’s state of the nation address. I don’t care about what she has done or what she will do. Her name and the whole of her being – just everything about her, are tainted. She can get defensive or play “paawa” and I don’t care. I’m giving comments and airing my opinion not because I care about her but because I care about my self and the Filipino people (and I’m excessively opinionated).

I consider myself a leader, too. I may not have held positions that would qualify even for one tenth or one hundredth of hers but I believe that I know more about leadership. (Haha, pamati) Leadership is not about me, myself and I; it’s about other people, those whom I am serving. I may be doing everything which I believe is good for them. I may give all my time, efforts and energy - but these are no assurance that I am being a good leader.

A leader is like a product. If the customers do not like you, whether you are good for their health or not, you are not good enough. Like a product, the leader’s quality is measured by customer satisfaction.

In Gloria’s situation, come on, who’s satisfied?!

PS: I hope rejectig GMA is as easy as rejecting or vommitting (I like this better, hehe) a product.

Go for Peace

With Rey, EIC of the NDMC Pub; Jay Pee, fellow student leader at NDDU and Rean, SSG Officer from NDMC - student peace advocates

I saw this pix somewhere..... then copied it. What is its relevance aside from having me in it? It's a remembrance of my peace advocacy years in college. I hope there are opportunities to still actively take part in this advocacy.

Superheroes

I watched Hancock last Saturday - the first movie I have watched in more than two months (I don't remember the last one) and my very first here in Marbel.

It was another superb performance (my opinion) from Will Smith. Had another actor played the role, I would not have appreciated the movie. I wasn't expecting for a literal modern day superhero. Will Smith did not exactly have the "superhero" look on the movie poster. So I was quite surprised to see the man flying.

A lot of times, Hancock was on the verge of crying, or perhaps, he already was crying. Lesson is, Men do cry, even the strongest and most powerful ones. And such act does not make them less manly. I think he's the first superhero I've seen who came closest to crying. Or did I see Spiderman cry? Oh, I don't remember.

Speaking of Superheroes, do they exist in reality? Nah, never in the past, at present or in the future, unless mutations will give rise to the existence of mutants like X-Men. That's not happening in the near future or in my lifetime. I hope it won't happen at all.

So why do we create images and stories of superheroes when we know that they never existed and will never exist? Moviemakers, storytellers and artists probably would reason that superheroes are products of their creativity and great imagination. Art is art, regardless of it's being realistic or not.

But superheroes would not gain much popularity unless they are patronized by people. Yes, superhero stories are popular because we crave for them. We want them to solve our biggest problems on the spot. We need them to fight criminals. We want them to protect us from everything bad. And we want them to have feelings and fall in love with us, thus, we want them to be humans, too. I don't remember a superhero who does not have a love affair.

If they will be humans like us, they, too will be susceptible to errors.They can feel rejection. They may get overwhelmed. They can be influenced. And they will have problems as well. And their problems might become our problems, too. They may be working for us at one point and against in another. There is no assurance. There is no security.

More bothering is that we will direct to them all of our burdens and responsibilities. In the long run, we find ourselves very dependent; and we are not anymore capable of taking control of our lives. Everything will be given and when superheroes will suddenly go, die or evaporate, how will we survive?

So do we really need superheroes? I believe not... We are already good as we are. We make mistakes. We learn.

Economy vs Environment

There have been so many changes in my hometown in just less than two months that I’ve been away.

I was supposed to go to Davao to visit friends and take exams at Ateneo. But due to the recent bombings and threats, I decided to postpone the trip. I spent Friday night at home and went back here in Marbel today.

But before going back, I had a breakfast date with Lyda. I asked papa to take me to her place in Casa Luisa Village; and on our way there, we saw tents and some construction activities in the lot in front of SocSarGen Hospital which used to be vacant. Robinson’s Mall is being constructed there. I thought it was just chismis. Apparently, it’s true.

A hundred meters from that site, houses were also being built in what will be Agan Homes Subdivision. There were already a dozen houses which are done. I heard about the said subdivision last April because my bestfriend Kris said then that he’d like to buy a unit. And at that time, Lyda told us that all the units have already been sold. So the houses were already sold out even before the very first house was built. Lyda also told Kris that he most likely could not afford a unit because the lowest monthly payment is around P7,000. Come on!! That’s the biggest monthly payment for any subdivision unit in GenSan. We live in the subdivision, too, and I believe that our monthly payment is only P2,000plus. But then, we’ve been living there for almost 15 years now.

That area is residential although there are many vacant lots and in not so far away are rice fields. With the construction of Robinson’s, it is inevitable that other commercial establishments will also follow. Businessmen will offer to buy lands from homeowners in the area who most likely will sell their lands because of the tempting high prices. They are not exactly rich people and a P1M offer for a 100 sq. meter land will probably pay off their debts. But that is not really alarming. With the activities and noise in the mall and other establishments even at late nights and early mornings, residents of the area are probably better off somewhere else. But I suggest that they don’t take the first offer. Wait some more, invest in time, be patient and let businessmen continually increase their offers.

Have you heard of rice fields a few hundred meters away from a big mall? That will be the scenario in Lagao and Casa Luisa soon. Right now, tenants are not too worried yet. But when businessmen and investors will start offering big bucks to land owners and others start selling lands, the rest will probably follow. What good is their farm in the middle of commercial establishments? With pollution and toxic wastes produced by such establishments, directly or indirectly, the lands will not anymore be conducive for farming.

Am I in favor of these changes? I really have no strong opinion of the matter but I can point out pros and cons. With the industrial development, there will be an increase in job opportunities. There will also be greater competition, leading to better quality of products and services which are offered at lower prices. Consumers will have more choices; and city and party people will have more venues to have fun. But in exchange for all these, there will be more pollutants, noise and probably crimes, too. What used to be agricultural lands will become industrial. Farmers who rent/lease the lands will lose jobs and they could not be expected to work for commercial firms because they are not qualified.

Economy versus environment has been a topic of many debates since Industrial Revolution. I hope it is possible that we all come out winners out of these changes.

Confessions of a pet lover

I've always been into animals. I remember, when I was in grade school, I would save my baon to buy chicks. At the time, they were sold at the city market and in a stall in Lagao at P20 each. I've bought more than 10 chicks and only 1 came to live with me until maturity. The others died or were saved by people who could better take care of them. I never allowed my parents or neighbors touch my precious surviving pet chicken.

My father bought me a turtle which I eventually lost. Well, it actually escaped. I'm a freedom-lover and I did not want my pets to feel as though they were prisoners. I left my turtle in a planggana. Later, it swam in the canal and of course never came back.

Because my parents tried very hard not to play favorites (or pretended that there is no favorite), they bought my siblings and I three ducklings, one for each of us. It was just a front; for my sister and brother were never into pets. I claimed all three ducklings and my siblings couldn't care less. My joy with having them was a little longer than with the turtle. They at least spent the night with me, on my bed, and the next day swam in the canal. Never even bothered to say good bye! They, too, never came back. I've had birds, white mice and cats as well.

My fondness for animals is probably attributed to missing farm life and the animals we used to have. . .

But when I was in high school, I forgot about them. I was busy with barkada, activities, UAAP, movies, contests, crushes and orgs. While in college (in later years), my interest in having pets again surfaced. I got a dog which looks like the one in the movie, The Mask. I'm not sure of the breed but it's no asong kalye, although I got teased by friends that my beloved dog was ugly. It's small, playful and very much into me. I named him Du, the term of endearment of a special friend and I (eeewww).

During Regional PRISAA held in GenSan where I was a facilitator, I stayed at school even in the evenings. One time when I went home to get clothes, Du was making kulit and followed the trisikad when I left. The dog must have missed me so much. I thought he could find his way back home because he usually did. Apparently, he never came back. My parents thought that I took him to school because I have done so many times before.

When I learned that he's missing, after PRISAA when I finally got home, I was broken. I swore that I will find him no matter what. I felt very guilty because I did not make sure that he was safe at home. He must have tried to really get to me and eventually got lost.

With my brother, who does everything I tell him to do, I looked for Du first in our subdividion, then in the purok and barangay. We walked and walked, called out his name but no Du emerged. After months, I still looked around, hoping that I'd find him. But I never did.

I thought I'd never have another dog. Then came Twofi. Why the name, it's a long story.... He's a labrador. At four months, he was already big but could not walk yet. I carried him a lot then. He's got these wonderful, expressive eyes. I really loved Twofi. But it was hard taking care of such a big dog. And he has o.a. and exag needs - shampoos, food, etc.

He was very attached to me, like most labradors are to their owners. He'd like us to play always. I just didn't have the time. When I'd leave for school, he'd cry but I couldn't do anything about it. He'd run to me and spoil my uniform. A lot of times, I went to school not in uniform because Twofi got them dirty. Speaking of dirt, he poops a lot, too! And the time came when I didn't want to look at him anymore because it would be hard to get away, physically and emotionally.

My parents were busy as well so we had to let him go. He was given to a co-teacher of my mother who promised to give us a child of Twofi. It was sad parting with him but at least I know where he is, and that he's safe.

Then came Mac2X. I bought him from a friend of a friend - half Japanese spitz (?) and half something else. He's really very cute and is such an attention seeker. He has some eeww habits though. His favorite activity was masturbating on my big lion stuffed toy. I never held that lion toy again.

I know I could keep Mac but when a cousin visited and took an interest in him, my parents found an easy way to rid of my dog. I couldn't complain much because I wasn't the one grooming him. I was always out. I never cleaned his dirt. I wasn't being a responsible pet owner. And they promised that Mac would be available when I am available. So Mac is with my cousin now and is very much loved there.

But the pet that had the biggest impact in my life is Cara, my baby rabbit. This story got this long and far, without my intention, but the real story lies in Cara. After the introduction, finally, we got to her. . . .

Cara was bought in Gaisano when she was two weeks old. She was very cute and adorable, with yellow hairs. Everyone just loved her. She was popular among fellow student leaders, too. They would drop by at the SSG Office to have a look at her and bring her food. Officers never complained even if the office and the tables were filled with Cara's dirt. She was part of all the activities - Acquaintance parties, meetings, etc. I brought her to Water Gran for the Leadership Seminar but left her on the second day to my colleagues because I had to go back to GenSan for a competition. When I got back to her, she was sick. She would not eat and was in a very poor condition. The inevitable happened, Cara died. And her first death anniversary was last July 21, 2008.

That was one of the saddest days of my life, not only because I lost a pet I loved so much but because I received one of the most important lessons in life the hard way. As a human being, I took control over other beings, in this case, Cara, but I was not responsible. I treated Cara as a trophy, a pet to show off to other people. She was constantly passed from one hand to another like she's a toy. I gathered all the rewards of being the pet owner but I never really took care of her. All these I acknowledged during the memorial service my co-officers and I gave to Cara.

Her remains lie at the grounds of Water Gran. And she will forever remind me and all the others whose lives she touched that we must not take for granted those that are given to us and that we must always be responsible.

Many times I was tempted to buy another rabbit but never got to. It's either I reminded myself of Cara or I got reminded by friends and family about her. Oftentimes it's the latter. In time, when I am ready, I will again have another bunny....

Find Your Way Out

Women empowerment is one of the goals of gender equality advocacy.... I hope my opinion is not exaggerated.

There is balance in everything - yin and yang, positive and negative, north and south, right and left. Therefore, for every entrance, there is an exit.

I have no choice, we hear this lots of times, and more often from married unhappy women who cling to their marriage; who could not leave their abusive, idle, drunkard husbands because they stick to the vow - for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, til death do us part. Death may actually come sooner to them if they will not take actions.

If your husband does not respect you now, do not expect too much that he'd change in the future. And if he does, it's most likely for worse!

I have nothing against getting married. I admire couples whose partnership and love grow stronger each day. I only speak strongly about abusive and unhappy marriages - physical, financial, psychological and emotional torture.

You have a choice. You may have chosen to get married but you do not have to stay married if it's demeaning or killing you. There is an exit. You can choose a happier and better life. You deserve that.

If you feel that you are not given justice as a person and as a child of God, leave. . . The God who created us does not even harm us, so why would we allow others to do so.

But what if I couldn't find a door out? Look at the door where you got in. It could not evaporate. From the outside, it's called an entrance; and from the inside, it may be your exit door. Mind you, this entrance-exit concept applies to almost anything, not just in relationships. . .

A Gender-Fair World

The quest for gender fairness and equality is a long battle. Are we winning? I believe so....

There have been so many positive changes already. And we have to thank the courageous people of the past and present who fought and are fighting for this cause.

Women now have equal rights with men - to vote, work, own property, etc. Gender is not anymore limited to the concepts and standards set on being men and women.

On the surface, we can say that we can now choose how to live our life, who our partners will be, what our personal choices are in clothes, style, profession, etc.

But beyond the surface, we still battle with judgmental people, some laws and the norms in our society.

This had been a long battle indeed. And the fight is not yet over. Let us choose the right side....


Four years ago, gender equality advocates in NDDU (including me) organized and founded Notre Dame Students Task Force on Gender Awareness and Equality Advocacy (NDSTF-GAEA) . NDSTF was Virgilio's idea while GAEA was John's. It is only now, as I read in a material, that I learned that GAEA is more than an acronym. GAEA is the goddess of the Earth, a symbol of women empowerment...... hehe, I should have known earlier.

CBA Acquaintance Party: Thumbs Up!

More than a thousand students attended the College of Business Administration Acquaintance Party yesterday, July 19 at the NDMU Gymnasium.

The venue was very well-decorated and everything was just wonderful. Students were grouped, six in all, and were given group names which include a color and an animal. The color red was of course coupled with horse, gold with eagle and white with rabbit. Not very original but we were nevertheless amused.

There were interactive activities like dance showdown wherein all members of each group gathered in the center to dance, one group at a time. Members of the CBA Indak demonstrated the steps and the students followed.

The CBA Dean led the faculty in a showdown against the CBA Indak dancers. And the Faculty won! As judged by the students. It was not a showdown where the better dancers prevailed, I admit.... The final performance was the final and only practice. It was practically a follow-the-leader activity. But the students seemed to have fun so everyone was happy, which of course is the most important of all.

At times like this, when I am left alone with nothing to do but sit and look, although hundreds of people are around, my thoughts wander..... to the future, to the unknown. I travel to the deepest part of my heart and soul. And while the students partied, I wrote my stories (on my phone) until the battery drained....

Ukay

During city or town celebrations and festivals, folks look forward not only to the competitions, concerts and events but also to flea markets.

The plaza is usually packed with tents which offer various products - cheap bracelets and earrings; pirated cds and dvds; toys and more.

For the past five years or so, as more and more people patronize ukay2x items, these stuff conquered the flea markets as well. Ukay stuff are second-hand clothes (shirts, dresses, pants, shorts, etc.), bags and shoes.

I myself am a certified ukay girl. They say that doing ukay is a talent, then at least I have one talent to boast of. More than half of my blouses are bought from ukay2x stalls in GenSan, Cotabato and Kidapawan. I have yet to buy ukay blouses here in Marbel.

While I am proud of this talent and the amount I save because I need not buy expensive branded clothes, I could not be too proud to be part of a big corrupt system.

I learned years ago that the stuff we call ukay should go the less fortunate. They are donations from people in the first world countries - intended to be given to the victims of calamities, to those who live in the depressed areas and to the needy who could not afford to buy clothes. But as the items reach the shores of our country, these relief goods are sold by officials to ukay stall owners. The goods never reach their supposed destinations.

Sad, right? And what is more sad is that we seem to be blind or we pretend to be blind from all these. Why, I even bought a pair of red doll shoes from ukay yesterday. I'm no hypocrite, I love the red shoes...

FYI: A flea market is a place where vendors come to sell or trade their goods. The goods are usually inexpensive and range in quality depending on several factors, which might include urban or rural location, part of the country, or popularity or size of the flea market.

The original flea market is likely to be the Marché aux puces of Saint-Ouen, Seine-Saint-Denis, in the northern suburbs of Paris. It is a large, long-established outdoor bazaar, one of four in Paris. They earned their name from the flea-infested clothing and rags sold there.

My Art

I realized just now that it's really hard to forget the things which had been part of my life; even though I have temporarily (and for a long time) turned away from them.

As a kid, I thought I'd be an artist when I grow up (when is the grown-up stage exactly?). I amused my relatives with drawings on our grounds although I don't think my parents were amused with the carvings and drawings on walls, cabinets and tables.

I spent my elementary years joining, and lots of times, winning arts competitions. There were so many events that elementary schools celebrate - Linggo/Buwan ng Wika, Nutrition Month, United Nations Month, etc. And part of the celebrations were poster making competitions. My mother is a teacher in the same school where I studied so my siblings and I always had great support in our art. She'd conceptualize what we would draw, thus, much of our glory is attributed to her.

And because visual arts was such a great part of my life then, I applied for a scholarship at Philippine High School for the Arts. PHSA is a haven for the future great artists of the country. It is located in Mt. Makiling, Los Banos, Laguna. The school is unlike other secondary schools. Students have majors - Visual Arts, Creative Writing, Ballet, Music (singing or instrumental), Dance, Drama (or something like that). Every student has one major. Mine was Visual Arts. There were 40 plus of us in our batch and 12 majoring in Visual Arts.

I got accepted after several examinations, interviews and art sessions. So I guess, they saw potential in me. I learned later though that my acceptance to the school was heavily influenced by the good marks I got in the academic examinations and interviews; while my grades for the art outputs were average. Anyway, I went there to study and pursue what once was my dream - to be a great artist. I actually wanted to be one!!!! Funny it seems now. And so very far from what I have become and the path that I have taken.

So I studied at PHSA.... Where and when did things go wrong (or right) and why am I not working to become the great artist I wanted to be? Haha. I did not last long there. The first months were okay. I had friends from my elementary school who were also scholars there. We were having fun with fellow students in watching (for free) shows in the CCP, roaming in the mountains (which is against the rules), and of course, developing our art.

But I knew that while I can create artworks, I was far behind the real good ones in class. I soon developed insecurities but I was good in not showing them. While I was making tolerable and barely passing marks in my major, I was soaring high in the academics - never out of top 5 and master (among my classmates) in Math. At nights, before we do our plates (that is what we call our artwork), they would ask me to tutor them in Math. I never declined, more because I felt better to be good at something; for I have accepted my position when it comes to our major. But I'm not really the last in the list. Around top 8 in 12. Hehe. Still, for a higly competitive person that I was then, I never intended to settle for that. And, it was obvious, I did not have the talent to be the artist I dreamed to be.

At the end of the school year, I left the school supposedly just to take the summer vacation but I never came back. I did not even bother say final good bye to friends. I forgot about them and moved on with my life at Mindanao State University-High school Department in GenSan. Together with forgetting PHSA and the friends I have made, I also forgot my art....... I never again joined any arts competition. I never held a pen to draw. Never again were my clothes smudged with paint. I totally turned away from arts.

So what about it now? .... Well, I haven't thought about visual arts for a decade. And while going through blogs of other people, I saw this account of an artist where his works are posted. I appreciate his art and their meanings. I realized just now that I could also tell my stories through visual arts. And it came to me that I am now prepared to try again - not to become a great artist, but merely pursue an interest which I have not given justice. Maybe I can finally move on. . . .

TGIT

Thank God It's Thursday.....

I wouldn't say this on normal weeks. Does this mean this week is not normal? Yeah, sort of. This week is special - the celebrations of the T'nalak Festival and 42nd Foundation Anniversary of South Cotabato. And tomorrow, Friday, is a holiday!!!

I did promise to myself that I will enjoy the celebrations through attending events, buying stuff and ukay2x in the flea market, etc. I attended just one event, the Choir Competition but I have not been to the flea markets YET. I did enjoy..... doing activities not related to the celebrations - sleep, eat, read novels, sleep, eat, it will go on.

But tomorrow I'll conquer the streets!!! Who cares if I'm alone. Hehe

No Regrets

The National Youth Commission identified days ago the 28 youth delegates from the different regions in the coutry who will represent the Philippines to the 35th Ship for Southeast Asia Youth Program (35th SSEAYP) which will be on October 21- December 25, 2008.

The participants will have a training this week at Tagaytay. The National Youth Commission was calling me yesterday morning. I was aware of the calls. But I could not dare press the 'Answer' button. I saw what was coming. I did not stop what I was doing; and after some 15 minutes and around 8 missed calls, the battery of my phone drained. I let it be. I could have charged the phone but I did not. I waited until I got home in the evening to do the charging.

Apparently, NYC continued its efforts to reach me but decided at 5pm to get a filler for me from the National Capital Region. I myself am supposed to be a filler. One of the female official delegates could not attend the training because she was hospitalized, I had been told through text. I was next in rank, so I was to fill in for her.

I could not join the program and I have my reasons; reasons which I do not have the courage to tell the NYC people. Because in the first place, I applied and showed interest to the program. But things have changed.

Joing the SSEAYP entails leaving NDMU, after working here for only a month and a half. I have to go to Manila for the training and stay there to process documents for travel. I could not drop everything now. I hold seven classes. There may be other faculty members who could fill in but I will cause so much complications, discomfort and burden. I do not have the heart to face the administrators who openly accepted me despite perhaps my lack of qualifications; and tell them now that I'm leaving because of greater opportunities.

By committing to SSEAYP, I will enter the world of uncertainty. I am not really afraid of the uncertain. I am a person who welcomes challenges and adventure. But this is different. There are more entities to consider. And I have found a place for myself already. I love what I do and I have committed myself to so many activities in the College of Business. If I leave, I cannot assume that they will take me back, after leaving them hanging in the air. . .

I do not want to let go of the weekends in GenSan; the sembreak and Christmas break, the only times that I see my brother and spend time with him; the trip to Davao this 26th to see former classmates and take entrance exams for Masteral; the dinners and outings with friends; and more.

Because I seem to have countless excuses, perhaps I don't deserve to be part of the program and the endless possibilities that it can give me - meeting people, going to different countries, engaging in activities. Maybe it is just right that I won't be there.

I don't regret letting the SSEAYP experience slip away but I do regret how badly I responded to the situation. I should have been more responsible. I should have faced them by accepting the call (although I still do not know how I could answer them). Where are my values?! Wasn't I taught that the best and only way to face anything dreadful is to be honest... And this I had not been.

There are lessons learned. I certainly won't be such a coward again. I've learned to check on my priorities and also consider other people. My decisions do not only affect me but also others.

From here, I can only move on. I am happy to be where I am now. I have all the things that make me happy at my hand. I may not be happy about my poor attitude toward NYC but I intend to be more responsible from now on.

I am not a person who lives with "What ifs." At the end of the day, what matters most is that I am the one who makes my choices and I am happy with them (minus not answering the phone).

I hope the NYC won't take this against me, should I hope to apply for other programs in the future. . .

Starstruck

Yes, you can meet stars through blogging!!! I don't care much about the television or movies now. I don't have access; perhaps I'm not just interested. And I have found a better way to entertain myself - to write and read blogs!!!! I'm new to this world they call blogosphere (is this right?!); and on only my second month, I have posted more than 40 artcles (or whatever they are called). I'm not really into the number of posts. It is just now that I realized I've written that many already.

Okay, so going back to the title, Starstruck. I don't usually get starstruck, even upon seeing stars in person. I've seen Dingdong Dantes and Antoinette Taus during their TGIS days. I was studying at the Philippine High School for the Arts then. I've seen Ara Mina, Jessa Saragosa, Bobby Andrews; haha, even Cristy Fermin in a mall where they were shooting Cristy Per Minute (or something like). Who else? Some Starstruck reality tv show stars, etc. And I never got starstruck!!!

So what's with being starstruck now? Well, I came across the blog of Mikee Lee. . . Know him? He's one of the housemates of the PBB Teen Edition, Kim-Gerald batch. I did not get starstruck the first time I happened to see his blog. I didn't know it was the teen Mikee I've seen on tv. I didn't know Mikee's last name then and he's not really much in the television scene now. Well, good for him. I have nothing against tv people but Mikee is certainly doing better things, for himself and for other people. He is better off preparing himself for bigger commitments than doing very commercial tv ads and shows. I've heard that he's on Y Speak! Now, that is different. The show is just great and they feature and discuss very relevant issues.

So Mikee the writer got me starstruck. He was no star in my eyes as a tv personality but he surely is as a blogger. . . . check out http://meltingpen .blogspot.com.

Okay. So for five minutes I was overwhelmed. I feel better now, my normal self. . . I got over being starstruck. But I've typed this thing already. I don't feel very good about erasing it. So this post will stay. But I'm starstruck no more!!! Hehe
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100 Dreams

July is Leadership Month in NDDU. The annual leadership training is usually conducted on the third week of this month. So it will be on July 19th this year.

I remember (just now) a particular activity we facilitators underwent two years ago in preparation for the training. Facilitators had to undergo the activities first because we will not be able to have those during the seminar proper.

So the particular activity that I remember now is writing down 1oo dreams. I never got to write a hundred. I wrote around 30. And at the top of my list was to become a CPA Board topnotcher. Funny, it seems now. At the time, it was actually my greatest dream. . .

Hmmm. . . Maybe I'll write down my hundred dreams now and finally complete the list. I'm not really sure whether the topnotch thing is still included. More likely, it is not. But I am sure I can have a hundred others written down.

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Si Bob Ong

Kakaiba itong si Bob Ong. Kilala mo ba sya? Nakakahiya mang sabihin dahil nga sa mundo ng mga manunulat at mahihilig magbasa, ang pangalang Bob Ong ay sikat, ngunit ngayon ko pa lamang kinikilala ang kakaibang manunulat na ito.

Naaalala ko, noong ako ay nasa Manila, Setyembre ng nakaraang taon, kasama ang kapwa mga myembro ng Philippine Marist Youth Council, nabanggit ng aking isang kasamahan, si Marky, na magaling na manunulat itong si Bob. Wala akong masyadong interes dahil nalaman ko mula sa nasabing kaibigan, si Marky nga, na ang panulat ni Bob ay sa wikang Filipino.

Dahil sa masyadong papuri ng aking kaibigan at para siya ay mapagbigyan na rin, bumili ako ng kopya ng isa niyang libro. Si Marky naman ay bumili rin, ngunit ibang libro. Nang sa gayon, pwede kaming maghiraman. O pwede siyang humiram dahil nga hindi naman talaga ako interesado. Ni hindi ko nga maalala ang title ng mga nasabing aklat.

Sumunod na araw, nakipagkita si Marky sa isa niyang kaibigan nang kami ay nasa airport pabalik sa GenSan. Aba, panatiko rin ni Bob Ong ang kaibigang ito, at binigyan si Marky ng kopya ng aklat na nagkataong pareho sa nabili nito nung nakaraang araw. Dahil nga wala naman akong pakialam, ipinagpalit namin ang isa sa parehong mga aklat niya at yung aklat na siya namang binili ko.

Nakalimutan kong bilhan ng pasalubong ang matalik na kaibigang si Bro Willy. At dahil kami ay nasa airport na, at dahil wala rin akong interes sa aklat ni Bob Ong, napagdesisyunan kong ibigay na lamang kay Bro ang aklat.

Hindi ko rin alam kung nabasa ni Bro ang aklat o kung ano ang reaksyon niya dito. Siya naman ay nagpasalamat. Period. Ngunit napag-alaman ko na may mga malalaswang salita na ginamit sa aklat, sabi ni Marky makalipas ang ilang buwan. Salamat at hindi ko alam ang reaksyon ni Bro.

Bago matapos ang nakaraang taon, napag-alaman ko na ang isa pang kaibigang si Eric ay panatiko rin ni Bob Ong. Aba! Magaling nga siguro ang manunulat na ito. Ngunit hindi pa rin ako nakahanap ng panahon, libro at pagkakataon upang mabasa ang kanyang mga gawa.

Nang magpadala si Ate ng mga aklat, napasama ang Stainless Longganisa, isa sa mga panulat ni Bob. Kagabi, sa kawalan ng magawa, o sa katamarang mag-aral, naisipan kong basahin ang aklat. Pero aking aaminin, ako'y nalalabuan kay Bob Ong. Paminsa'y natatawa ako. Paminsan nama'y hindi. Ngunit siya nga ay kakaiba.

Natawa man ako o hindi, isa ang sigurado at ito ang pinakaimportante para sa isang manunulat. Si Bob Ong ay nakaimpluwensiya sa akin bilang nagbabasa. At ito ay ang magsulat sa wikang Filipino!

Come on, ang hirap!!! Baka ito na ang huli. . .

Miss Venezuela is Miss U 2008

Dayana Mendoza of Venezuela was crowned Miss Universe 2008 today at Vietnam, host of this year's most prestigious beauty pageant.

Miss Venezuela, 22, was once kidnapped in her homeland and says the experience taught her to remain poised under pressure.

During her interview with the judges, Mendoza was asked who she thought has it easier in life, women or men. "God made us to share and have differences," she replied, then highlighted what she regards as the different thought processes of men and women. "Men think that the faster way to go to a point is to go straight," she said. "Women know that the faster way to go to a point is to go to the curves."

Miss Colombia finished second behind Mendoza, followed by Miss Dominican Republic, Miss Russia and Miss Mexico.

Miss Philippines did not make it to top ten.

.... I watched the pageant (through ABS-CBN) at the CBA Faculty Room. Miss Venezuela is beautiful and she is GLOWING. I find Miss Mexico beautiful, too. But then, Miss U is not just about physical beauty. Miss USA looked so mature. I like her, although she seems far from the others. It's obvious that she's older. Hehe. I don't know how Miss Russia even got to be in Top 10. She's got the worst hair and lips. Again, beauty alone does not define beauty queens.

Survivor

Have you ever considered joining this hit reality tv show?

With a one million dollar prize, millions dream of joining Survivor. I do watch but I am not among the many who want to join.

I see the show, like many (but NOT all) reality shows as the easiest way to ruin and shame one's self, emotionally and psychologically. And what is worse is that millions get to witness your fall.

Worldly motivations prevail - the money, fame and glory. It is competition in its dirtiest form. Values are tested and judged. If you want to stay in the game, you have to outwit everyone. And in doing so, you compromise ethics and morals. You make friends but will have to betray them one way or another in order to get ahead. Or maybe you will only befriend them as a strategy. It then becomes hard to know what's real and what's not. . . .

Others would say that it's only a game, nothing personal. But there is really nothing that's not personal in this world. It's a game, but a cruel and ugly one.

The show Survivor does not reflect the true meaning of the word. Surviving is not about competing with other people and emerging Number 1. In life, your only competitor is yourself. And the real prize - a happy, healthy and value-oriented existence. . .

J O U R N E Y

Life is a journey and hopefully, we all make ours meaningful. Hehe. Here are some tips on journeying, written by yours truly, inspired by other people, readings and my experiences. . .

1. Know where you are going. Set a goal and achieve it.
2. Be prepared. Pack well. But do not bring excessive baggage.
   
3. Do not hurry. There is really no rush.
   
4. Do not take short cuts. Your journey might end too soon.
5. Care to look at the sights. Some may be beautiful, others are not so. Appreciate them nonetheless.
6. Have stopovers. Take pictures or buy souvenirs. They will remind you of the wonderful journey.
7. Talk to people. They have wonderful stories to tell. They can give directions, too.
   
8. Leave things along the way. They will help you find the way back when you get lost.
9. Pick up people who need a ride but could not afford. It's always nice to be of help.
10. Enjoy and always have fun!!!

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Our Deepest Fears

We fear aging.
But as we age, we learn more and become more beautiful.

We fear the dark.
But only in the dark can we see the stars.

We fear being alone.
But the best company is our own self.

We fear imperfections.
But our imperfections lead us to constant improvement.

We fear problems and obstacles.
But only through overcoming them will be become strong.

We fear death.
But for a Christian, death is the greatest reward. . .

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Inspired ako. . .

Having a blog account gives me an opportunity to read the thoughts of other people. And after clicking this and that, I came across this specific post of one fellow blogger. It's about the things that she feels inspired to do. . . Due to lack of originality (o baka na-inspire nya rin ako), I'd like to post those which I'm inspired to do, too. . . I'll try to communicate my thoughts in my native language, Filipino, which I am not very good at.

Inspired akong:

1. Matulog. Kailangan ba ng inspirasyon sa pagtulog o ma-inspire matulog? Ewan. Gusto kong palaging natutulog; at masarap matulog; at masaya ako habang natutulog at tuwing pagkatapos matulog (in other words, masaya ako paggising); at sa paggising, gusto ko nanamang matulog. . .
2. Kumain. Wala na akong pakialam kung tataba man ako o hindi. No more rules sa type of food at quantity of food. Inspired akong kumain dahil masarap ang pagkain at kinikita ko ang pinambibili ko ng pagkain. . . Actually, masaya lang talaga ang kumain at masaya ang buhay kaya dapat hindi pinipigilan ang sarili sa pagkain!!! Kung meron lang din naman. . .
   
3. Matuto. Ang blog na ito ang isa sa mga produkto ng inspirasyong ito. Inspired akong matuto lalo na sa mga related sa kahinaan ko, una sa listahan ang gaheto. Isali na rin ang pagsusulat sa wikang Filipino. Maliban sa mga gaheto at teknolohiya, inspirado rin akong matuto ng marami pang bagay na may kinalaman sa buhay, pamilya, pag-ibig, pagkakaibigan, pag-aaral at marami pa. . .
   
4. Magsulat. Napakatagal na panahon akong nalayo sa interes na ito dahil sa hindi gaanong masayang mga rason. Dalawang taon at sampung buwan!!! At sa blog ko pa nagawa itong muli.
   
5. Magbasa. Ang mga aklat ay tinuturing kong mga kaibigan. At tulad ng pagkakaibigan, ako at ang aking mga aklat ay may mga pinagdadaanan. Hindi sa lahat ng panahon ay nagkakasundo kami ng aking mga nababasa kaya dumadaan din kami sa mga pag-aaway, dulot ng individual differences. Pero sa huli, nananaig ang pagkakaibigan.
6. Magturo. Ito ang pinakamasaya at pinaka-rewarding (haha, ang hirap i-translate) na trabahao. Syempre opinyon ko lang ito. Sa pagtuturo, ako ay natututo rin. Sobra.
7. Maging Masaya. Tumawa ng malakas. Umiyak habang tumatawa. Basta, maging laging masaya.
   
8. Marami pa.

Ang hirap mag-Filipino. . .

South Cotabato Celebrates 9th T'nalak Festival

South Cotabato - The 9th T'nalak Festival will kick off this July 11, 2008. The celebration will culminate on July 18, 2008, the province's 42nd Foundation Anniversary.

The eight-day event aims to showcase the province's investment and tourism potentials. This is also an opportunity for the people of the region to celebrate and honor the great riches of South Cotabato. Tourists from all over the country and from abroad are very much invited to join and enjoy the celebration.

Activities lined up for the festivities include an Agri-trade Fair, Bazaars, Concerts featuring the Kitty Girls and Mocha, cultural shows, Streetdancing Competition, Big Stars Basketball Exhibition Game, Mutya ng South Cotabato, Grand Fireworks Display Competition, Disco sa Kalye, visits to various tourism attractions in the province and more.

The T'nalak festival was named after the T'nalak, an indigenous, colorful cloth woven by women of the T'boli tribe. The cloth has brought recognition to the province in the national and international scene.

T'nalak Fest is Coming

The City of Koronadal will celebrate the 9th T'nalak Festival this July 11-18, 2008.

I'm excited!!! This is my first time to take part in the celebration, not that I actually have a direct part. I will only be one of the many spectators. And I intend to make the most out of this celebration.

I come from GenSan. We have Tuna Festival and Kalilangan there, celebrated annually on September and February, respectively. Fun activities are conducted and the Oval Plaza is transformed into a flea market, with ukay2X, lots of cheap stuff and more.

This T'nalak experience will be new to me. Although I know that there will be a flea market, too. Tents were being set up last week. Maybe they are already operational at this point.

We will not be honoring the tuna but the rich culture of South Cotabato. I intend to enjoy...

Sleeveless, Shorts, Shirt and Slippers in Gibraltar

Nice view. Yeah, very nice.
Don't mind the face. Hehe.
But really, you're looking good sis.
At naka-sleeveless!!!! Eeeww.




Shirt, shorts and slippers..... I don't think my sister could pull that off in GenSan or in Makati. It's really different in other countries. You get to wear whatever you want to. Maybe not entirely true. How would people there react if she had worn a gown.... Haha. Wala lang.

Who's Crazy?!?

Were there times when you judged others to be crazy? Or you considered yourself to be one?

When I read a book about a woman who is young, intelligent and good-looking; but decided to die because of what I considered to be abrurd reasons, it was very easy for me to charge her as crazy. She has no family and financial problems. She has a good job and the present and future (in the surface) are sure to be good for her. Yet, she decides to die.

It had been easy to judge and say that she's crazy..... And why? Because I immediately related myself to her. I am young. I'm not sure about the beauty issue. I am satisfied with my brains. I have no family problems. I am happy with my job. And the present and future are sure to be good. Do I want to die? Heck, Nooooo!!!!!!! Wanting to die is a crazy thought.

And that is the very reason why I judged the young woman to be crazy. Because she is different from me.

But having read the book, there were realizations. One of the characters in the book discussed being crazy in a philosophical way. Let us forget science and hormones and chemicals for now.

This woman said: (Mind you, this character is crazy)

Anyone who lives in his/her own world is crazy. Like schizophrenics, psychopaths, maniacs. I mean people who are different from others.

You have been Einstein, saying that there was no time or space, just a combination of the two. Or Columbus, insisting that on the other side of the world lay not an abyss but a continent. Or Edmund Hillary, convinced that a man could reach the top of Everest. Or the Beatles, who created an entirely different sort of music and dressed like people from another time. Those people - and thousands of others - all lived in their own world.

Indeed, many of the greatest artists and popular historical figures had been considered crazy when they were still alive. And why not, they were different. They did not think and act the same way most people did. But after centuries, we honor them for their great contributions. Yes, we honor the crazy!!!!

Here's another one:

A powerful wizard, who wanted to destroy an entire kingdom, placed a magic potion in the well from which all the inhabitants drank. Whoever drank that water would go mad.

The following morning, the whole population drank from the well and they all went mad, apart from the king and his family, who had a well set aside for them alone, which the magician had not managed to poison. The king was worried and tried to control the population by issuing a series of edicts governing security and public health. The policemen and inspectors, however, had also drank the poisoned water; and they thought the king's decisions were absurd and resolved to take no notice of them.

When the inhabitants of the kingdom heard these decrees, they became convinced that the king had gone mad and was now giving nonsensical orders. They marched on the castle and called for his abdication.

In despair, the king prepared to step down from the throne. But the queen stopped him, saying, 'Let us go and drink from the communal well. Then we will be the same as them.' And that was what they did: The king and quees drank from the water of madness and immediately began talking nonsense. Their subjects repented at once; now that the king was displaying such wisdom, why not allow him to continue ruling the country?

The country continued to live in peace, although its inhabitants behaved very differently from those of its neighbors. And the king was able to govern until the end of his days.

I can relate. Why not.... I am crazy and have done crazy things, too. I am different and have many times departed from the norms . I am not great though. I am crazy.

Are you crazy?

My Baby Bro

This is my Baby Bro.

Although he is 18 years old already and 5’7” in height, he will remain to be my baby…

He was tolerant of that when he was young but suddenly rebelled against the babying when he was in high school and back to being tolerant of it upon studying in MAAP.

He is my most loyal fan. He believes in everything I say. I used to tell him stories of this and that - historical accounts, scientific discoveries, fiction; mostly fiction which I claim to be true. He was always in awe. In his eyes, I am the intelligent sister and will always be such.

He suffers from my worst attacks, physically and verbally. He never laid a finger on me even after hitting him lots of times. I hope this will not reach my parents. I do not and did not hit anyone else. I don’t remember what caused the fights but I know there were many.

Truly, we can hurt even the ones we love most. But I don’t advice it. I’m pro-peace and against violence. And despite everything, he still loves me. And if we don’t lose them after all the fights, harsh words and beatings, our love will withstand time and everything else.
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Brain Exercise 2

Some more Q and A!!!! I'm amused with this activity that's why I decided to share this with whoever drops by. Try to answer the questions, too. You'll get answers from yourself which you were not conscious of before. You will certainly get to know yourself better.


(1) If you have to live far away from civilization for a year and could only bring one item, what would it be? A very durable comb. I comb a lot and that is probably the reason why my hair is brittle. I always get scolded because I comb anywhere and everywhere - in the streets, in the classroom, in the restaurant. Poor manners.

(2) If you have to choose a city to visit, what would it be? If I had been asked a year ago, I would have chosen Cairo or any city in Africa. The answer is different now. I'll go to Gibraltar!!! Is Gibraltar a city or nation or what? I don't know. I'll go to the city where my sister is.

(3) Name any city in the world that you would like to get lost in? Las Vegas. I'm a fan of the CSI series, the original.
Taken I am lost. I assume that I have no money. It's okay to get lost and have no money in Las Vegas. It's a city that never sleeps. Anyway, I can engage in a lot of sidelines. Hehe. It's not what you have in mind!!!!

(4) If you could add the knowledge of another person's brain into your brain, whose brain would you choose? I have a lot to choose from!!!
a. Sir Jet's. He's good in science and mathematics, perfect combination, what else could you ask for. He can refute any argument or claim, whether he believes in it or not. He is full of wisdom, yet very humble.
b. Rolly Jude's. He's a master quizbowler, terrific writer, etc. He's humble, too!!!
c. Mama's. She is so practical. She has an answer to every problem.
d. Nico-something's. I forgot his name. He is an Accounting geek from Midsayap. No comment on the issue of humility. His Accounting knowledge is excellent, period.

But I can't make up my mind on just one!!!!! And I don't have the heart to take away what they keep in their brains. Lastly, I am not lacking myself. Yeah, there are limitations, but I am satisfied with what I have.

Come on, I don't need to be excellent in science. My Math is already above average. There are no more debate and quiz bowl competitions for me. About practicalities, experience will teach me best. And I can learn Accounting. I'm really just fine with myself.

(5) What skill would you like to learn if you have all the time and resources in the world? It has always been my dream to work for the United Nations and be a missionary in Africa; or be a Marist lay missionary in Africa still. Among the requirements is to speak at least five accepted languages. I know only one - English.
So if given the chance to learn anything, I'd like to learn to speak the following languages:
* Portuguese
* French
* German
* Any African language

(6) What or who makes you smile? His smile.... Hehe
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Brain Exercise

Give your brain some exercise!!! Boggling your mind isn't such a bad thing when you end up getting to know yourself and others a little better. A fun papermelroti product - Query 2.

One of the things I inherited from my sister (she had to part with her stuff upon leaving the country) was a box filled with cards. Each card has a question which you probably never thought of asking yourself.

The Q and A is supposed to be done with others, thus, a group activity. But I'm alone, miles away from home (although not really very far), with no friends in this city; so the bottom line is, I have no one to ask and no one to give answers to. So for the nth time, this blog has no choice but to hear me out.

The question on one card is 'You were chosen as the representative of the whole humankind to a newly discovered planet inhabited by aliens. You could bring five people with you. Who would you bring?

Here they are:

My bestfriend Kris. What's with the label? I got used to it already, that's all. Since I want him to come with us, we'll leave after he passes the board exam. I just can't leave without him.

Meng. After the Deo Espin incident last Summerfest, I know he can cope with anything, including alien contact. Who knows, he might actually want to stay with them... Hehe. We haven't bonded for some time now. This may be the opportunity.

John. This man always makes himself available. It comes with the friendship package, which I have quite abused (and enjoyed). He doesn't crack even with so much pressure. He will take care of the group.


Lyda. She is a champion public speaker and debater. I'm naturally shy, so she can do the talking. She is also a charmer!!! And most importantly, we can have so much fun making fun of the whole experience. Hopefully, she will be allowed to take a leave of absence from Planters Bank.

Macky can take the blame should anything or everything go wrong. Hehe.
This is the second time that Macky graced this site. His devotion to his friends, to me especially, had been featured in 'Remembering Macky'. It was posted two weeks ago.

I realized just now that even though Lyda may be good in talking, such skill may not be too relevant because the aliens speak a different language. But she can still charm them!!! hehe

Okay, Menardo and Macky can do the talking or whatever form of communication. Kris will remain at the back with me because he doesn't have patience for what he considers to be unnatural. John will break up any fight, should there be one.

It's wonderful to have such flexible and great friends.

PS: (included a day after the 'Brain Exercise' was posted)

Ate is part of everything in my life. And she's complaining why she's not included in the trip. Hehe. But there are reasons behind that. First, she is not a fan of politics or diplomacy. She is a pure academic.... Second, she can't take a 'leave' from her work.. She just can't. Third, we'll fight and fight there. It's not new but our fighting scenes might scare the aliens.... So she just can't come.

I forgot. Jay-ar might complain why he wasn't included. I'll bargain with the authorities. He must come, too!!!!

Done with Veronika

A week ago, I wrote about Veronika, a Slovene who decided to die. I did not have the patience to read more than three chapters of the book at the time but finally gathered enough patience earlier to finish reading it.

The novel, Veronika Decides to Die isn't as bad as I originally thought it to be. Actually, it's not bad at all. It's just different from all other novels I've read.

The novel was written by Paulo Coelho, a Brazilian writer who is more philosophical than most novelists. Yes, I can say that he is certainly different from the others. But then, every great artist became great because he/she had been different, otherwise, there will be no distinction between the great one from the rest.

I had been judgmental, looking at things at face value and taking things literally. I failed to recognize that there is always something deeper in everything.

I will not divulge the details, whether Veronika died or not. But this is for sure - I now appreciate the art of Coelho, who welcomed me and many readers into the depth of human emotions and thoughts.

If you guys have time, patience and energy, try the book. You will learn a lot.

Runners Do Get Tired

For many years, I have been running. I've won many and lost some.

A few months ago, after my latest and most triumphant run, I suddenly felt the need to stop, and I did, with no rush to conquer another finish line.

Every athlete ages, gets tired, retires...

I don't think those were my reasons for taking a break. Yes, I may have stopped running. But this is only for a while- to rest, to listen.

Sometimes, we see life as a never-ending track and field match. We tend to forget to look deeper and appreciate the miles we have covered, the places we passed by and the people we meet along the way. We are so focused on the finish line. We run for the sake of running and winning, with no greater purpose.

It may not be too late for me. I am now taking one step at a time, absolutely not rushing; certainly not caring whether fellow runners get ahead of me. There is no need to achieve record-breaking runs. I will enjoy the walk and let God guide me......
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Gibraltar, GenSan and Coke

Gibraltar - a view from my Ate's hotel room. This looks like a view of Pioneer Avenue (General Santos City) from a room in Sidney Hotel.



Sis, with Nettie (hey, I didn't know it was Nettie, the cute and beautiful Girl!!!; well, until I saw this pix). They worked together at Isla Lipana in Makati before the Gibraltar escapade.

They have Coke in Gibraltar!!! Come on Zea (!!!), if we have Coke in GenSan, why can't they have the same in any other place in the world?!
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The Philippines on 'The Broker'

John Grisham, famous for his novels whose lead characters are lawyers, good and bad ones. No surprise here because he is a lawyer, although I believe that he does not practice such profession anymore. He is probably a better writer than a lawyer. Isn't he cute? Hehe. He looks like Dan Brown (in this picture).

The Philippines was mentioned in John Grisham's novel, The Broker.

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Wow!, was my first reaction. My favorite writer acknowledges the existence of my country!

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But when I read the line again, I realized that his reference to dear Philippines was not at all positive. In the story, a broker in the name of Joel Backman was given full pardon by the outgoing President of the United States on the eleventh hour (hours before leaving the Oval Office).

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One of the broker's former associates turned on the tv for the international news, expecting full coverage of the pardon, at the same time worried to death that Backman would come knocking on his door, a ghost returning to life to take back what is his.

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Upon turning on the television, he was surprised but glad that there were diversions.'Thankfully, a busload of Danish tourists had been kidnapped in the Philippines, otherwise, Joel Backman would have been the top story,' he muttered. Anyway, the Backman story came second.

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This is certainly a reflection of how foreign intellectuals view the Philippines - a haven for terrorists. I don't condemn John Grisham for his views. I did not have raised eyebrows upon reading novels which refer to countries in the Middle East (I'm not naming them) as supportive of terroristic and anti-America activities. The issue of the Philippines is no exception.

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I don't condemn the Philippines, too. I am a Filipino. I only condemn the acts, never the people or my country.

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Coincidence?!?

As I was reading my post about Ate in Gibraltar, I realized that the feature in the Google Ad board was about Gibraltar, promoting it. 'Know before you go. Real stories from travelers,' it says. Weird........ Anyway, at this second, the feature has changed.

Do they feature the Philippines, too?! Haha. I wish.....
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No GenSan for me this weekend

I did make a promise to try to be home on weekends. But there will be no Zea in GenSan this weekend.

Last week's problems were not addressed. There is a mountain of clothes to be washed. The test papers have yet to be checked. There will be an acquaintance party at the dorm. I will attend an acquaintance party of a co-curricular org.... And more.

This may also be an opportunity to see more of Marbel. I've been here for a month now, yet the only places I've been to are NDMU, dorm, KCC, McGrill (with friends from GenSan), church and bus terminal. Yes, I will surely see more of Marbel. I will start with FitMart, the forgotten mall. Hehe.

Haiiiiii..... No GenSan for me this weekend. Hopefully, I will not be missed.
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Irresponsible Book Addict

The Digital Fortress, written by Dan Brown (the famous author of the Da Vinci Code), is about breaking codes. The US of A is supposed to have a machine that could decode even the longest and most complex of all codes. But this was threatened by something, the 'Digital Fortress.'

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Deception Point is about deception of course. But aren't they all?! With Dan Brown, almost everything is about deception. It's about a supposed find of the NASA, one that is far greater than all other modern scientific revelations.

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I finished reading two books in five days - Dan Brown's Deception Point and Digital Fortress. I'm on book number 3, John Grisham's The Broker.

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This is probably the reason why I could not touch my laundry (unwashed for a month now) and test papers. How irresponsible.

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I could not say that I like Dan Brown's books. It had been too easy to guess who the villains are. Dan Brown is somehow obsessed with unraveling hoaxes; and the plot is almost the same for all his books, including the Da Vinci Code.

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But I certainly appreciate his efforts in doing lots of research work because his examples are very specific. Well, they SEEM true and realistic.

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As for John Grisham, it's still the same. He remains to be one of my favorites.

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Ate: in Gibraltar

Take a look at Gibraltar, a British overseas territory located near the southernmost tip of the Iberian Peninsula, overlooking the Strait of Gibraltar.

This is the famous Rock of Gibraltar. The place indeed has similarities to GenSan for they have access to the seas, hehe.

Ate is in Gibraltar already, two days after leaving our beloved Philippines.

It took two days for her to get there because they had two stopovers, Dubai and London.... Hitting three birds with one stone.

She may not have seen the beauty of the cities because they were not allowed to leave the waiting area, at least she could claim that she has set foot in both London and Dubai, even if only at the airport.

In her recent post in my Friendster account, she wrote, 'This place is just like GenSan, only cleaner, with roads paved and with hundreds of tourists along the the roads.'

I'm not sure whether she said that because she actually believes that there are similarities between GenSan and Gibraltar, or it's her defense mechanism for missing home, hehe.

Gibraltar is the least and last of places I was interested in before. I actually thought that it is located in Central America. I know now of course that it is in Europe, I've been told three months ago when Ate said she's going there.

I checked some sites and images of the place. It does look good and there in the background is the famous rock which was included in my sister's tales. I wish I could see the place. (Sponsorship, Ate!!!!)

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Love Story on Hold

During college, when the idea of writing crosses my mind, I would immediately make accounts of my latest love obsession. I would start my story with the overwhelming feelings I had - the heart that stops beating, the meeting of the eyes, the assumptions and illusions.

I may have started my stories well but they never had an ending. In the end, I kept them to myself and ultimately, with the change of heart (crush), the articles evaporated together with the feelings.

So consumed I had been with love or the idea of it that I never entertained doing more meaningful literary works. But then, such job was not expected of me. I had been the copyreader in the publication, never the writer. And with the many articles I've checked (others were modified, others underwent major overhauls), I never had much chance to have anything of mine published.

Perhaps I took so much pride finding faults in other writers' works that I was afraid it would backfire. They might find fault in mine - signs of too much self-pride and egotism. But I believe that through the years, I have developed better and stronger values, hopefully, hehe.

I disassociated myself from the publication almost three years ago, so goodbye copyreading. And in the years since then, I grew farther away from journalism (No thanks to you Riki, hehe). I tried another career path.

Surprisingly, when I took on blogging, the idea of writing about a love story never occurred. It had been only now that I remeber how I had been as a writer years ago. Change certainly is constant.

But this does not mean that I will never write my love story again. I will just have to wait, for of course I have yet to experience one.

This time, I will be patient and hopefully, I can finish the story. It will be the first.
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